One of the qualities we admire most in other people is their level of kindness towards others and themselves.
When we refer to kindness, we are referring to the qualities of being friendly, generous, compassionate and considerate. The kinder we are, the more we are perceived as someone trustworthy and a person that can be counted on to do the right things.
Although we may not always realise it, we are given multiple opportunities to bring more kindness or performance acts of kindness daily. Sometimes it’s the little things that can make a big difference to someone’s day and how they are feeling. Acts of kindness can change a person’s life.
The good thing about performing more acts of kindness is that it can also be beneficial to us in many ways, which can include:
- Improving our relationship with others.
- Bringing more joy and satisfaction into our lives.
- Inspiring others to also show more kindness to other people.
- Helping others cope better with challenges they may be facing.
- Increasing the level of trust others have with us.
Author, Robert Collier, once said, “Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.”
Oftentimes, we hope for some miracle that will make us an overnight success but anyone who has achieved any noteworthy success will reveal that they became successful because they consistently did things to move closer to the success they wanted over a long period of time.
Even though we are bombarded with “instant benefits” messages like a new miracle pill that will help us shed weight quickly or a new income opportunity that will make us a lot of money fast, the truth is it’s the small things we do today that will lead to a better tomorrow.
If we want to create a better future, we must do the best we can today.
Our ability to trust ourselves plays a huge part in everything we do in life. Most of the trust issues we have with others is often a reflection of the level of trust we have with ourselves.
Whenever we meet new people, we’re always assessing whether we like or trust them, even before we have gotten to know them. The challenge with trust is that it can take a long time to gain someone else’s trust, but we can lose it very quickly with just one mistake.
Similarly, when we fail to follow through on a commitment we made or do not keep our agreements, our level of self-trust declines very quickly, and that not only affects what we do, it also affects how we do things and how much of ourselves we put into things.
Learning to trust ourselves more is such an important part of developing as a person because more self-trust leads to better relationships with ourselves and others, and it is directly linked to how much happiness we experience in life.
There is a saying, “Patience is a virtue,” which refers to the ability or willingness to wait for something without reacting negatively. That quality is admirable and extremely valuable to have.
The challenge we face is that in today’s “instant gratification” society, our patience is being tested all the time. From the time we get up, we can find ourselves running late, being caught in rush hour traffic, or experience delays in our work due to no fault of ours, all of which tests our patience.
The signs of impatience are unmistakeable. They include:
- Irritation or anger.
- Feeling rushed or under pressure.
- Shallow breathing which may include short breaths.
- Restlessness or being fidgety.
- Hands clenching or tightening due to muscle tension.
- Nervousness or feeling anxious.
The more we’re able to develop our ability to be patient, the more relaxed we’ll be, which in turn, will help us deal with events a lot better.
In our modern world, in which we are constantly connected through instant messaging and notifications, finding time alone has all but vanished from our lifestyle.
The constant busyness leads to two of the most common excuses why people are not following what they really would love to do, which is, “I don’t have the time” and “I’m too busy.”
The truth is being alone can actually bring us a lot of benefits, as we allow ourselves to take a break from our hectic life. This is why some of the Eastern practices like meditation, yoga, Tai Chi, and other spiritual or religious practices are so appealing to those of us who just want to slow down.
One of the best gifts we can give ourselves is to cultivate time alone so that we can tap into our inner wisdom and guidance. That can only happen if we are intentional about spending time alone.
There is an internal reward or satisfying feeling we get whenever we are making progress in life. A big part of making progress is by being willing to challenge ourselves to improve in all areas of our lives.
Improving ourselves may involve:
- Developing new skills and abilities.
- Acquiring new knowledge.
- Learning new behaviours and attitudes.
- Forming new empowering habits.
- Letting go of things that are no longer serving us.
Self-improvement leads to growth, which leads to progress. Whenever we are making progress and making improvements to our lives, it opens the door up to new opportunities and possibilities that we may not even been aware of previously.
At a training program I once attended, the trainer explained that when we worry, we are negative goal setting. In other words, we are bringing into our lives the very things we do not want because we are giving energy and focus to them.
We often get so caught up with the future and how our lives will be months or years from now that we fail to recognise that the only moment we have is the present. Even though we know we cannot change anything that has happened to us in the past, we still can easily fall into the trap of dwelling on the past and wishing that things had been different or better.
Similarly, becoming too focused or driven to create a better future can result in us missing the beauty, wonder, joy and miracles that are around us right now. While there is a lot of value in knowing where we want to go in the future, it does not mean we obsess about the future and forget to really enjoy and appreciate the only thing we will ever have — this present moment.
The benefits of living in the present moment include:
- Detaching ourselves from the past or future which means we can appreciate what we have in life now.
- It eliminates stress from our lives as we only have to focus on the present moment.
- It reduces overwhelm as we can choose to do only what we can at any given moment.
- It will help us be more relaxed and have a healthy attitude.
While we all have different definitions of what success means to us, there are common things, if done well, will eventually lead to the results we are looking for.
We often can shorten the path to success by learning from those who have achieved the success we want because success does leave clues. If we study people who have achieved notable success, we will find a number of things in common with them.
One of those things will be they made many difficult decisions or choices in life, which may have been unpopular at the time, but it eventually helped them reach the level of success they wanted.
It is important to grasp this idea because in order to get new results, we have to be willing to do things we have not done before. Some of those things may involve letting go of some of the things that are currently holding us back and preventing us from achieving the success we want.
An absolute truth about life is that we cannot change what has happened in the past and we should focus on enjoying the present and doing the best we can in order to create a better future.
While that concept is extremely beneficial, there is value in looking back at the events and experiences we’ve had in order to move forward and create a better future. If things from the past aren’t addressed and remain incomplete, they can feel like an anchor around us and slow us down as we attempt to make improvements in our lives.
Just think of a conversation you had with someone that don’t go as well as you would have liked. How did it make you feel when you couldn’t mend things with that person? It’s more than likely the longer it remained unresolved, the more it played on your mind and affected you in a some way.
We must be willing to acknowledge and complete the past in order to embrace the future.
The way we start off our day in the mornings often has a major effect on how the rest of our day goes.
Have you ever noticed when you start off your day being frantic and rushed, the rest of your day seems to follow a similar pattern? Likewise, when you have a calm and purposeful start to your day, the rest of your day tends to continue in the same manner.
I know you may be thinking that every day for you is rushed, frantic and hectic no matter what you try to do! That is even more reason why we must be intentional about how we start off each day so that we can be in control of what we do and experience daily.
We should not leave what happens during our day to chance or external circumstances. We should be able to dictate how we start off our mornings and how we respond to situations we encounter during the day.
Having a good start to the day will:
- Put us in a better frame of mind to make the most of our day.
- Prevent us from being rushed and pressured to get things done.
- Help us respond to events or situations a lot better.
- Make us enjoy our day a lot more than when we feel rushed or stressed by the way we start our day.